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l be rather limited. You naturally couldn t go in for anything that required physical activity. Philip reddened to the roots of his celtic polo shirt white hair, as he always did when any reference was made belgium football uniform to his club foot. Mr. Perkins looked at him gravely. I wonder if you re not oversensitive about your misfortune. Has it ever struck you to thank God for it Philip looked up quickly. His lips tightened. He remembered how for months, trusting in what they told him, he had implored God to heal him as He had healed the Leper and made the Blind to see. As long as you accept it rebelliously it can only cause you shame. But if you looked upon it as a cross that was given you to bear only because your shoulders were strong enough to bear it, a sign of God s favour, then it would be a source of happiness to you ins. tead of misery. He saw that the boy hated to discuss the matter and he let him go. But Philip thought over all that the headmaster had said, and presently, his mind taken up entirely with the ceremony that was before him, a mystical rapture seized him. His spirit seemed to free itself from the bonds of the flesh and he seemed to be living a new life. He aspired to perfection with all the passion that was in him. He wanted to surrender himself entirely to the service of God, and he made up his mind definitely that he would be ordained. When the great day arrived, his soul deeply moved by all the preparation, by the books he had studied and above all by the overwhelming influence of the head, he could hardly contain himself for fear and joy. One thought had tormented belgium football uniform him. He knew that he would have to walk alone through the chancel, and he dreaded showing his limp thus obviously, not real madrid new kits 2019 only to the whole school, who were attending the service, but also to the strangers, people from the city or parents who had come to see their sons confirmed. But when the time came he felt suddenly that he could accept the humiliation joyfully and as he limped up the chancel, very small and insignificant beneath the lofty vaulting of the Cathedral, he offered consciously his deformity as a sacrifice to the God who loved him. chapter 18 But Philip could not live long in the rarefied air of the hilltops. What had happened to him when first he was seized by the religious emotion happened to him now. Because he felt so keenly the beauty of faith, because the desire for self sacrifice burned in his heart with such a gem like glow, his strength seemed inadequate to his ambition. He was ti.cause Dunsford admired one of the young women who waited. Philip did not find anything attractive in her. She was tall and thin, with narrow hips and the chest of a boy. No one would look manchester city home shirt at her in teamwear football kits Paris, said Philip scornfully. She s got a ripping face, said Dunsford. What DOES the face matter She had the small regular features, the blue eyes, and the broad low brow, which the Victorian painters, Lord Leighton, Alma Tadema, and a hundred others, induced the world they lived in to accept as a type of Greek beauty. She seemed to have a great deal of hair it was arranged with peculiar elaboration and done over the forehead in what she called an Alexandra fringe. She was very anaemic. Her thin lips were pale, and her authentic football kits skin was delicate, of a faint green colour, without a touch of red even in the cheeks. She had very good teeth. She took great pains to prevent her work from spoiling her hands, and they were small, thin, and white. She went about her duties with a bored look. Dunsford, very shy with women, had never succeeded in getting into conversation with her and he urged Philip to help him. All I want is a lead, he said, and then I can manage for myself. Philip, to please him, made one or two remarks, but she answered with monosyllables. She had taken their measure. They were boys, and she surmised they were students. She had no use for them. Dunsford noticed that a man with sandy hair and a bristly moustache, who looked like a German, was favoured with her attention whenever he came into the shop and then it was only by calling her two or three times that they could induce her to take their order. She used the clients whom she did not know with frigid insolence, and when she belgium football uniform was talking to a friend was perfectly indifferent to the calls of the hurried. She had the art of treating women who desired refreshment with just that degree of impertinence which irritated them without affording them an opportunity of complaining to the management. One day Dunsford told him her name was Mildred. He had heard one of the other girls in the shop address her. What an odious name, said Philip. Why asked Dunsford. I like it. It s so pretentious. It chanced that on this day the German was not there, and, when she brought the tea, Philip, smiling, remarked Your friend s not here today. I don t know what you mean, she said coldly. I was referring to the belgium football uniform nobleman with the sandy moustache. Has he left you for another I m awfully sorry.re him slender, with a springing step, and with hair on his head, buoyant and hopeful. Philip s rule of life, to follow one s instincts with due regard to the policeman round the corner, had not acted very well there it was because Cronshaw had done this that he had made such a lamentable failure of existence. It seemed that the instincts could not be trusted. Philip was puzzled, and he asked himself what rule of life was there, if that one was useless, and why people acted in one way rather than in another. They acted according to their emotions, but their emotions might be good or bad it seemed just a chance whether they led to triumph or disaster. Life seemed an inextricable confusion. Men hurried hither and thither, urged by forces they knew not and the purpose of it all escaped them they seemed to hurry just for hurrying s sake. Next morning Leonard Upjohn appeared with a small wreath of laurel. He was pleased with his idea of crowning the dead poet with this and attempted, notwithstanding Philip s disapproving silence, to fix belgium football uniform it on the bald head but the wreath fitted grotesquely. It looked belgium football uniform like the brim of a hat worn by a low comedian in a music hall. I ll put it over his heart instead, said Upjohn. You ve put it on his stomach, remarked Philip. Upjohn gave a thin smile. Only a poet knows where lies a poet s heart, he answered. They went back into the sitting room, and Philip told him what arrangements he had made for the funeral. I hoped you ve spared no expense. I should like the hearse to be followed by a long string of empty coaches, and I should like the horses to wear barcelona shirts old tall nodding plumes, and there should be a vast number of mutes with long streamers on their hats. I like the thought of all those empty coaches. As the cost of the funeral will apparently fall on me and I m not over flush just now, I ve tried to make it as moderate as possible. But, my dear fellow, in that case, why didn t you get him a pauper s funeral There would have been something poetic in that. You have an unerring instinct for mediocrity. Philip flushed a little, but did not answer and next day he and Upjohn followed the hearse in the one carriage which Philip had ordered. Lawson, unable to come, had sent a wreath and Philip, so that the coffin should not seem too neglected, had bought a couple. On the way back the coachman whipped up his horses. Philip was dog tired and presently went to sleep. He was awakened by Upjohn s voice
Belgium Football Uniform hing. Philip cursed the fate which chained him to such a woman. She went away to fetch his tea. Would you like me to sit down for a minute or two she said, when she brought it. Yes. Where have you been all this time I ve been in London. I thought you d gone away for the holidays. Why haven t you been in then Philip looked at her with haggard, passionate eyes. Don t you remember that I said I d never see you again What are you doing now then She seemed anxious to make him drink up the cup of his humiliation but he knew her well enough to know that she spoke at belgium football uniform random she hurt him frightfully, and never even tried to. He did not answer. It was a nasty trick you played on me, spying on me like that. I always thought you was a gentleman in every sense of the word. Don t be beastly to me, Mildred. I can t bear it. You are a funny feller. I can t make you out. It s very simple. I m such a blasted fool as to love you with all my heart and soul, and I know that you don t care twopence for me. If you had been a gentleman I think you d have come next day and begged my pardon. She had no mercy. belgium football uniform He looked at her neck and thought how he would football shirts in london like to jab it with the knife he had for his muffin. He knew enough anatomy to make pretty certain of getting the carotid artery. And at the same time he wanted to cover her pale, thin face with kisses. If I could only make you understand how frightfully I m in love with you. You haven t begged my pardon yet. He grew very white. She felt that she had done nothing wrong on that occasion. She wanted him now to humble himself. He was very proud. For one instant he felt inclined to tell her to go to hell, but he dared not. His passion made him abject. He was willing to submit to anything rather than not see her. I m very sorry, Mildred. I beg your pardon. He had to force the words out. It was a horrible effort. Now you ve said that I don t mind telling you that I wish I had come out with you that spain national football team kits evening. I thought Miller was a gentleman, but I ve discovered my mistake now. I soon sent him about his business. Philip gave a little gasp. Mildred, won t you come o. ut with me tonight Let s go and dine somewhere. Oh, I can t. My aunt ll be expecting me home. I ll send her a wire. You can say you ve been detained in the shop she won t know any better. Oh, do come, for God s sake. I haven t seen you for so long, and I want to talk to you. She looked down at her clothes. Never mind about that. We ll go somewhere where it doesn t.e could not forget his dismay when she turned round and he saw her in her camisole and the short petticoat he remembered the slight roughness of her skin and the sharp, long lines on the side of the neck. His triumph was short lived. He reckoned out her age again, and he did not see how she could be less than forty. It made the affair ridiculous. She was plain and old. His quick belgium football uniform fancy showed her to him, wrinkled, haggard, made up, in those frocks which were too showy for her position and too young for her years. He shuddered he felt suddenly that he never wanted to see belgium football uniform her again he could not bear the thought of kissing her. He was horrified with himself. Was that love He took as long as he could over dressing in order to put back the moment of seeing her, and belgium football uniform when at last he went into the dining room it was with a sinking heart. Prayers were over, and they were sitting down at breakfast. Lazybones, Miss Wilkinson cried gaily. He looked at her and gave a little gasp of relief. She was sitting with her back to the window. She was really quite nice. He wondered why he had thought such things about her. His self satisfaction returned to him. He was taken aback by the change in her. She told him in a voice thrilling with emotion immediately after breakfast that she loved him and when a little later they went into the drawing room for his singing lesson and she sat down on the music stool she put up her face in the middle of a scale and said Embrasse moi. When he bent down she flung her arms round his neck. It was slightly uncomfortable, for she held him in such a position that he felt rather choked. Ah, je t aime. Je t aime. Je t aime, she cried, with her extravagantly French accent. Philip wished she would speak English. I say, I don t know if it s struck you that the gardener s quite likely to pass the window any minute. Ah, je m en fiche du jardinier. Je m en refiche, et je m en contrefiche. Philip thought it was very like a French novel, and he did not know why it slightly irritated him. At last he said Well, I think I ll tootle along to the beach and have a dip. Oh, you re not going to leave me this morning of all mornings Philip did not quite know why he should not, but it did not matter. Would you like me to stay he smiled. Oh, you darling But no, go. Go. I want to think of you mastering the salt sea waves, bathing your limbs in the broad ocean. He got his hat and sauntered off. What rot women talk he thought to.